For the past few weeks I have been preaching on the subject of temptation under the title of “Short Cuts.” In recognizing my own capacity for “yielding” to the pervasive and persistent nature of temptation I observed what I chose to call Level 2 Temptation. This is the human propensity to respond to our yielding by sweeping all remembrance of the matter under the proverbial carpet in the hope that it will be forever erased from the memory.. The principle driving forces behind Level 2 Temptation are shame and guilt. These are first evidenced in the garden of Eden when Adam and Eve go from being “naked, but they felt no shame” Genesis 2:25 to “suddenly feeling shame” Genesis 3:7 (both NLT). This realization triggers the desire to hide and is followed by the assignment of blame by all those involved. This all falls under the overall category of attempting to sweep under the carpet. Tragically however the collection of things we keep under the carpet become arguably the most debilitating and destructive part of our lives. It has been said that we are only as healthy as our secrets and it is under the carpet that most if not all our secrets are hidden.
My understanding of this was greatly illuminated recently when Maggie and I had the privilege of attending the Global Leadership Summit. One of the sessions was lead by Dr Brene Brown, a research professor in social work from Houston. The main thrust of her work has been on the subjects of vulnerability and shame and her TED talks* on the subject are compelling (evidenced by the millions of viewings they have received). Dr Brown points out that guilt is the knowledge that you have done something bad but that shame is the overwhelming conviction that as a consequence you are bad. The answer, she suggests very persuasively, is vulnerability, the willingness to courageously turn over the carpet and deal with those festering secrets in a loving, safe and nonjudgmental environment.
Is there any greater challenge to the church family than to be such an environment? The word of God makes it clear that Jesus has provided the answer for guilt since, “when we confess our sin He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins…” 1 John 1:9 and the statement “if we are in Christ we are a new creation” deals directly with shame. So how can we seek to be this place of safety? Primarily I believe, we must be willing to be open and vulnerable ourselves. Take the courage to turn over our carpets and encourage and support each other in the process. The fewer secrets we have, the healthier a community we become. When we are honest with our struggles, we give people freedom to be honest about theirs. Healing and change only happen when things are brought into the light Loving, emotional health is one of the most attractive characteristics of individuals and their communities. Jesus’ death and resurrection have given us the hope that deals with guilt and shame. Let’s experience it ourselves and offer it to one another and resist Level 2 Temptation- keeping our carpets free from clutter!
(* This is the link I promised in the sermon “Carpet or ConfessIon”)
As I have spent time in the Psalms recently I have appreciated in a new way David giving us insight in to his prayer and worship life. Meditation has taken a very prominent part in my preparation. Campbell McAlpine in his book “Alone with God” describes meditation as “the devotional practice of pondering the words of a verse or verses of Scripture with a receptive heart” and Adele Ahlberg Calhoun in “The Spiritual Disciplines Handbook” suggests that we should ” like a cow chewing the cud, keep returning to the text with your mind and heart.” As a result of spending this time focused on the text I have re written a couple of psalms in different voices inn the pricess of grappling with their meaning for me today. I thought I would share them with you.
Psalm 8 (Roughly translated in the voice of an adopted child)
Mom and Dad, I know that this is your home and everything in it belongs to you
Even though there is no way I could have opened my mouth and asked or even suggested anything, you have used me as a demonstration of you love and care and overcome so much pain and rejection.
When I look at everything you have worked for, provided for our home its amazing you have thought of very detail.
Why you would share it with me I have no idea, but you have and you do! You told me I could treat this as my home and make use of all the wonderful things you have put in it.
You said I fit, that I belong in this special place.
Mum and Dad I know this is all yours but I am so grateful
Psalm 10 ( roughly translated in my voice)
God , how come you seem so far away from me here in Pacifica? How come you say you have a plan but you make impossible to find?
Many people round here seem to have little concern for those in our community that are really in need. They simply report the 150 homeless to the police because they don’t want them hanging out anywhere near them.
So many grand plans are made that are not designed to do much other other than to make those who make them look good.
And, they think that God is for Dummies and even if he does exist He neither notices nor cares what is going on. And sometimes perhaps I could be mistaken for one of them or at best someone who just stands, watches and finds fault …
Please God show us all how much you care, show those who ignore you that you don’t miss a trick. And show those who live for themselves that you are in charge and show those who suffer in so many ways that you have not forgotten them
And please show me how I can be part of that and give me the courage to say yes!
I found this really helpful as I seek to use these scriptures as a framework for my own prayer. Have you ever tried rewriting a Psalm in your own voice? How did it work for you?
Honestly we seem have little idea what to do with this strange day we call “Good Friday.” Growing up in England it was always a national holiday. Most, if not all, businesses closed and there was a sense of muted respect even in the lives of those for whom the message of the day was not understood. Coming to live in the US, I was initially struck by the scant attention that was paid to the day, especially by Christians. Some of the more traditional churches offered observant meditations and others held evening events but there was very little to suggest that there was anything to remember on this particular day. Remember what ?
This year, as never before, I have been impacted by the need to remember and grapple with the darkness that was such a stark reality, particularly for that little group of Jesus followers 2000 years ago. As one of them sold him, another denied even knowing Him, and all disappeared fearing for their lives, Jesus walked a lonely and agonizing path.
He endured trials that made a mockery of justice along with mental and physical abuse beyond our imagination only to be nailed on a cross. Why? Because, a few hours before, he had knelt in quiet of the garden of Gethsemane and surrendered to His Father’s plan. It was His decision and from that moment He walked with resolve and purpose into the darkness. Nothing happened by accident. He chose to grasp every moment with both hands.
So how should we, as Jesus followers today, observe Good Friday? We can learn from Peter, impetuous enthusiastic Peter who only opens his mouth to change feet! How heroic was his promise never to leave Jesus’ side but how tragic the paralyzing fear that resulted in him not only leaving him but denying that he even knew Jesus. How excruciating the moment must have been when those eyes, the eyes of his precious friend “ the Lord turned and looked upon Peter and Peter remembered”. The darkness had drawn out and revealed his self-confidence and arrogance. Not to humiliate and crush him, but to restore and heal him so he could become the pillar on which God would build the church. But for now, on the day we now call “Good Friday”, he needed to wait in the darkness and confront the truth.
There is, of course, so much to learn from Jesus. He surrendered to the will of His Father and headed resolutely into the darkness. Things did not get better. They got worse until he would gasp those final words “It is finished”. However it was that absolute trust in his Father that gave Him the strength to proceed with unwavering conviction.
We are blessed to know the next chapter and the joy and victory it brings but we should not rush past Good Friday. I believe we must pause to embrace its darkness and pain. Maybe God has something to call out of us, so that he might bring us healing and transformation. Or perhaps His purpose is to renew our confidence in Him and our perseverance so that, by truly embracing the darkness now we might celebrate an amazing Easter Sunday and be used by Him in significant ways in the future.
When He was on the way to the cross Jesus clearly envisaged a totally fresh approach to relationship for the future when he “comforted” his disciples.
I will talk to the Father, and he’ll provide you another Friend so that you will always have someone with you. This Friend is the Spirit of Truth. The godless world can’t take him in because it doesn’t have eyes to see him, doesn’t know what to look for. But you know him already because he has been staying with you, and will even be in you…The Friend, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send at my request, will make everything plain to you. He will remind you of all the things I have told you. John 14:16-17,26 MSG
At first glance this does not seem comforting at all. Actually it seems entirely incomprehensible! Our relationships are dependent on our auditory and visual senses. However, neither eyes nor ears seem to have a significant role in the relational developments Jesus shares with his closest friends . But He clearly implies this “new” relationship will be better than their current experience of having Jesus physically present with them most of the time. How can this be? Centuries later we are still grappling for the answer.
And then there are the times He gives us a hint. Lying on a hospital bed waiting for surgery to remove my melanoma Maggie said to me that she had really sensed powerfully that these verses from Isaiah 43 were for us on that day; we read them out loud together and prayed them through.
Surgery completed and news of the melanoma having spread to my lymph nodes, I called my mother in the UK to give her the news. Within an hour she called back and said that as she was praying for us a passage from Isaiah came strongly to her mind. Yes it was the same verses from Isaiah 43:1-3a.
But now, O Jacob, listen to the LORD who created you.
O Israel, the one who formed you says,
“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.
I have called you by name; you are mine.
When you go through deep waters,
I will be with you.
When you go through rivers of difficulty,
you will not drown.
When you walk through the fire of oppression,
you will not be burned up;
the flames will not consume you.
For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.
Did we “hear God or “see” him? No. Did He speak? Most certainly yes, and He made a point of reassuring us of that fact through my mother.
I am very aware that I have barely touched the reality and the mystery of this relationship that God has designed for me. However the amazing thing is that because it is not dependent on sight nor sound it can be real for each of us at the same time and all the time, regardless of our location! So let’s not give up asking Him to teach us how to experience the fullness of this new way of relating. Don’t you think, if Jesus says its better, ultimately it must be?
During this week of Prayer and fasting we are challenged to think about what is means to “deny ourselves” I found this anonymous poem which is uncomfortably relevant to the subject
Dying to Self
When you are forgotten, or neglected, or purposely
Set at naught, and you don’t sting and hurt with the insult or the oversight, but your heart is happy, being counted worthy to suffer for Christ
THAT IS DYING TO SELF
When your good is evil spoken of, when your wishes
Are crossed, your advice disregarded, your opinion ridiculed, and you refuse to let anger rise in your heart, or even defend yourself, but take it all in patient loving silence,
THAT IS DYING TO SELF
When you lovingly and patiently bear any disorder, any
Irregularity, any unpunctuality, or any annoyance; when you
Can stand face to face with waste, folly, extravagance, spiritual insensibility and endure it as Jesus endured it
THAT IS DYING TO SELF
When you are content with any food, any offering, any raiment, any climate, any society, any solitude, any interruption by the will of God,
THAT IS DYING TO SELF
When you never care to refer to yourself in conversation, or to record your own good works, or itch after commendation, when you can truly love to be unknown,
THAT IS DYING TO SELF
When you can see your brother prosper and have his need met
And can honestly rejoice with him in spirit and feel no envy or question God, while your own needs are far greater and in desperate circumstances,
THAT IS DYING TO SELF
When you can receive correction and reproof from one of less stature than yourself, and can humbly submit inwardly as well as outwardly, finding no rebelling or resentment rising up within your heart,
THAT IS DYING TO SELF
Are you dead yet?
As I sat at my desk recently I noticed once again the proliferation of books! Yes I do have a Kindle which helps but, no matter how hard I try, piles rise relentlessly from every surface in my vicinity. Most books have been opened but I could not honestly say I am “reading “them. As I pondered this I realized my reading habits in many ways fuel this phenomenon. In my mind I have the books around me in three categories.
First are those in the “dipping ” collection. These are volumes that have caught my attention for one reason or another (or perhaps come from the amazing IVP Book Club!). They have an interesting title that is relevant either to my devotional interests or some subject about which I am or might preach. So I have dipped! I have read the back cover to see who has endorsed the content and what qualifications or context the author writes from. I have also consulted the table of contents from which I have found I can learn so much more about the book than simply chapter headings. If a writer gives his chapters quirky or amusing titles their style will, in all likely hood, be very different than one whose titles are simply subject headings. The way in which chapters are ordered or collected also gives insight into how the author thinks about their subject. Often I will also read the introduction and occasionally the first pages of a couple of chapters. This done, most books take their place in one or other of the piles.
Then there is what I call the “dunking” books. Dunking is a more substantial immersion that just a dip! These volumes are ones that I have discovered whole chapters or sections that interest me. Sometimes a chapter will address a particular question I have been asked or challenge I am facing. Inevitably these volumes spend at least some time resting in one pile or another , maybe a smaller one or one closer to me but a pile nevertheless.
However none of these has reached the final stage of “devouring.” These are the books ( hopefully not more that a couple at any one time!) that have so captivated me that I have determined to read them systematically from cover to cover with yellow highlighter in hand. If my Kindle is in my hand, notes, marks and highlights are frequent and I am unable to resist the temptation to talk about the content to anyone who will listen.
Here are a few books that I have currently in some of these groups:
Dippers
“Whats a Christian to do with Harry Potter” Connie Neal “Found: God’s Will” John MacArthur “Creating a Missional Culture” JR Woodward, “Community is Messy” Heather Zempel, “Preaching for God’s Glory” Alistair Begg, “Center Church” Tim Keller
Dunkers
“Pursuing God’s Will Together” Ruth Haley-Barton “Doing Church as a Team” Wayne Corderio ” The Lamb Wins” Simon Ponsonby, ” Deep and Wide” Andy Stanley,
Devouring
“Organic Outreach for Churches” Kevin Harney “Living into the Life of Jesus” Klaus Issler
Then there is a final group of well thumbed books that I have devoured and have so helped me that I like to keep them close and refer to them often ( but I can’t think of an adjective beginning with “D” for them!). Here are a few:
“Jesus Driven Ministry” Ajith Fernando, “A Praying Life” and “Love Walked Among Us” Paul Miller, “Invitations from God “Adele Ahlberg-Calhoun
How about you? Do you have any particular reading habits? Do you have books that you might place in any of the above categories that you could recommend?
In the quiet of Sunday morning, as I prepared to go to church for our Christmas service, I realized how much my excitement had diminished for the coming celebration. Of course I was looking forward to gathering with the family in our home to do all the normal “Christmas things” but really… Christmas, it seems, began earlier than ever and has arrived quicker than ever! The pressure and stress has mounted ensuring preoccupation with the purchasing of “stuff” and the preparing of an abundance of food for people (of whom I am one of course!) who have a lot of “stuff”and are often over fed.
Now in case you think I am just a miserable old Scrooge, let me assure you I love Christmas! However this year it has come home to me more powerfully than ever, that somehow we have almost lost sight of whose birthday we are celebrating and with that so much of the awe and wonder that makes the season so special. When I ask myself what is foremost in my mind in preparation for Christmas, Jesus has not been very prominent.
My sorrow was only deepened when I observed a child looking at a Nativity scene. “Who is the baby in the manger?” they were asked to which they replied “I don’t know.” Why should they know, I asked myself. We have done everything we can to erase any meaning from the season.. Cards rarely mention it, saying Happy Holidays to ensure nobody is offended. How did this happen? Have I been sleeping? The final verse of this powerful Christmas song from Casting Crowns (link to a full version of the song) says it all
America, what will we miss while we are sleeping
Will Jesus come again
And leave us slumbering where we lay
America, will we go down in history
As a nation with no room for its King
Will we be sleeping
Will we be sleeping
United States of America
Looks like another silent night
And yet the truth is told so powerfully by these two stanzas from Longfellow’s poem “Christmas Bells” (Once again set to music by Casting Crowns)
And in despair I bowed my head
There is no peace on earth I said
For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, goodwill to men
Then rang the bells more loud and deep
God is not dead, nor doth He sleep
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, goodwill to men
Well maybe I have been sleeping but I think it’s about time I woke up. How about you?
…so my grandson explained to me about the scary decorations he had seen for
Halloween! Once again the question of how, as a Christian, I should approach the
second biggest commercial holiday. As a pastor, how should I answer those members of
my church family who receive a range of messages from, instructions to avoid the
celebrations at all cost to just enjoy an innocent time of fun for children. Realizing that I
grew up far closer to the scene of the origination of the festival, one that began literally
thousands of years ago, I can see that my perspective may be different than those of
my adopted home here in the USA. So I decided to do a little research to ensure that
when I offered my opinion, I was able to support my feelings with fact.
Two resources proved to be very helpful, the first an excellent article on the website
History.com and the second an blogpost from Jim Daly, the president of Focus on the
Family. Both seem to set out balanced and helpful information to help frame the
approach we should have as Christians.
My concluded that both ends of the spectrum would benefit from some thoughtful
adjustment of their polemic. For those preaching a message of doom and destruction on
to participants, should note the unique evolution of the festival here in the United States
so helpfully set out in the historical article.
“By the 1920s and 1930s, Halloween had become a secular, but community-
centered holiday, with parades and town-wide parties as the featured entertainment.
Despite the best efforts of many schools and communities, vandalism began to plague
Halloween celebrations in many communities during this time. By the 1950s, town
leaders had successfully limited vandalism and Halloween had evolved into a holiday
directed mainly at the young. Due to the high numbers of young children during the
fifties baby boom, parties moved from town civic centers into the classroom or home,
where they could be more easily accommodated. Between 1920 and 1950, the
centuries-old practice of trick-or-treating was also revived. Trick-or-treating was a
relatively inexpensive way for an entire community to share the Halloween celebration”.
To oppose with such vehemence what has become a community festival centered on
small children risks obstructing the Christian message of the value of community.
However it is undeniable that, albeit distant, the historical background of the festival
has clear links with evil and the practice of dark and demonic religion. It is clear that
although many children are dressed in cute and wonderful costumes, some appear as
characters such as witches and other representations of death and destruction. These
unavoidably point back to the dangerous aspects of the holidayʼs history and run the
risk of making an unhealthy connection between evil and fun. The scripture warns us
that the evil one is at his most dangerous when he “masquerades as an angel of
light” ( 2 Cor 11:14). For us to detract from the enormous danger of such things must
be avoided at all costs.
Jim Daly warns us, in addition, of the growing danger of the glorification of violence in
our culture.
Christian or not, it is high time to turn away from the dark, gory and horror-filled side of
the holiday. Itʼs always been time, but the confluence of culture and recent current
events raises this matter to a new level.
There is absolutely nothing entertaining or redeeming about hatchet wielding villains
parading in costume or front-lawn displays featuring blood spattered body parts.
My suggestion therefore that, along with everything we do as Christians, we take the
time to ask ourselves a couple of questions. Would I be happy for Jesus to accompany
us on our trick or treating expedition dressed the way we are ? If Jesus was to visit our
home tonight would I be happy for Him to encounter the decorations in my front yard?
The answer to those questions and others like them will help ensure that we have a
uniquely Christian approach to the holiday and one which will may give us the chance to
share truth with our friends.
Continuing our look into “A Praying Life “ by Paul Miller one of the first questions he asks is, “ What good does it [prayer] do?” Like so much in this book, it is a question we have all asked often but rarely dared to utter out loud. Often our childlike faith gives way to cynicism in the wake of sincere prayers that seem to fall on deaf ears. As a consequence, deep down, there is a growing lack of confidence that prayer makes any difference.
Miller suggests that, in an attempt to get help we might visit an imaginary “prayer therapist”. Asked about what it means to be a child of God, we give a full account of the relevant doctrine. However when asked to describe what it feels like to spend time and talk with our Father…
“You cautiously tell the therapist how difficult it is to be in your Father’s presence, even for a couple of minutes. Your mind wanders. You aren’t sure what to say. You wonder, ‘Does prayer make any difference? Is God even there?’ Then you feel guilty for your doubts and just give up. Your therapist tells you what you already suspect. “Your relationship with your heavenly Father is dysfunctional. You talk as if you have an intimate relationship, but you don’t. Theoretically, it is close. Practically, it is distant. You need help.”
So how do we begin to reach for the type of prayer life that is described in the pages of our Bibles. Miller suggests we begin by realizing that prayer is first and foremost about relationship and to help us understand this he uses the image of a family meal
A praying life feels like our family mealtimes because prayer is all about relationship. It’s intimate and hints at eternity. We don’t think about communication or words but about whom we are talking with. Prayer is simply the medium through which we experience and connect to God. Oddly enough, many people struggle to learn how to pray because they are focusing on praying, not on God. Making prayer the center is like making conversation the center of a family mealtime. In prayer, focusing on the conversation is like trying to drive while looking at the windshield instead of through it. It freezes us, making us unsure of where to go. Conversation is only the vehicle through which we experience one another.
But then so many of our family meals these days are rushed, taken at different times dependent upon our diverse and frantic schedules. Could it be that this feature of our home lives is reflected in our experience of relationship (or lack of it) with our Father in heaven? Could be at least part of the reason we don’t experience “a praying life?”
Prayer has always been a challenge for me, and some years ago I committed myself to reading one book on prayer each year. As result I have read some really wonderful books (some of which I have listed at the end of the blog for your interest). Many of these have had a really significant influence on my prayer life and the book I am reading this year is no exception. In fact “A Praying Life “ by Paul Miller is challenging my prayer life more than any of the great books I have read in recent years. I say “is challenging” because although I have now finished the book I am already realizing that there are parts I must return to and read again. For this reason I thought I would share some of Miller’s insights with you over the next few weeks.
In his foreword David Powlinson whets our appetite with these words
“IT’S HARD TO PRAY. It’s hard enough for many of us to make an honest request to a friend we trust for something we truly need. But when the request gets labeled “praying” and the friend is termed “God,” things often get very tangled up. You’ve heard the contorted syntax, formulaic phrases, meaningless repetition, vague non-requests, pious tones of voice, and air of confusion. If you talked to your friends and family that way, they’d think you’d lost your mind! But you’ve probably talked that way to God.”
Tragically yes I have and I catch myself doing it all the time! Paul Miller however knows that it’s not meant to be that way and he has learned the hard way. He shares the lessons he has learned in the most challenging of all environments, his family. He explains in the introduction:
“The meat of the book is the family stories I tell. They are not dramatic; they’re nitty-gritty tales of surviving and thriving in a world of stress and disappointment. As you watch us, I hope you experience the presence of Jesus.”
I most certainly have experienced His presence and so I hope you will join the conversation with me. Perhaps you might even get your own copy of the book; I promise you will not regret it. So when you listen to yourself praying does it sound like a conversation you would have with someone who knows and loves you?
Books I have read and have found to be a great blessing (Most of these I have read once and continue to dip into frequently):
“Deepening your Conversation with God” Ben Patterson
A wonderful account of a pastor’s struggle to build a meaningful prayer life. Honest and clear with many practical lessons.
“With Christ in the School of Prayer” Andrew Murray
Written in 1895 this book has lost nothing over time. Its 31 lessons provide an immensely valuable month’s devotional or you can just sit down and read it!
“The Papa Prayer” Larry Crabb
This book has changed my practice of prayer more than any other, and I nearly did not read it because I did not like the title! If you only read one book on this list make it this one!
“Falling in Love with Prayer” Mike Macintosh
A practical prayer guide from the heart of a pastor. Mike Macintosh was inspired to love to pray by his pastor Chuck Smith and he passes the lessons on to his readers along with his own developing experiences.
“Prayer- Does it make any Difference” Philip Yancey
In true Yancey style he asks the difficult questions and is never satisfied with easy answers. An extensive yet reasonably easy to read look at the challenge of communication with God.
“Experiencing Prayer with Jesus” Henry and Norman Blackaby
From a family of prolific authors this is a very helpful look at the prayer habits of Jesus as set out for us in scripture
“When God Prays” Skip Heitzig
This book is from the Billy Graham library and focuses on probably the most remarkable prayer of all time. It would take a lifetime to plumb the depths of John 17 but this is not a bad place to start.
“Too Busy Not to Pray” Bill Hybels
Great practical book. Can also be an excellent book to read with your spouse, a couple of friends or as a small group study. (If you can read two this is No 2!)
“Prayer“ O Hallesby
Translated into English by Clarence Carlsen in 1931, I found this book on a give away table of books culled from the library. I am so glad they gave it away. It is a treasure!
“When God doesn’t answer your prayers” Jerry Sittser
Sittser lost three members of his immediate family in a tragic drunk driving accident. His wrestling with this subject brings us insights tested in the fire
From the Zebra Bag 