Archive for the ‘response’ Tag

Taking NO for an answer   1 comment

I have always been told that when we pray we can expect one of three answers, Yes No or wait. Now “yes” is always acceptable, “wait” is just about tolerable but “no”… !! As a consequence when I read (1Sam 7) the account of David and his plans to build a temple I always wonder what it felt like when God said “no” to him?

The king was in one of the most successful phases of his reign almost everything was going well. He had united the nation and defeated the Philistines who had been the bane of the nation’s life for years. He had established Jerusalem as his capital city and King Hiram of Tyre had sent laborers and materials to build him a palace.

At last, there was peace for the nation and as the king relaxes in his palace, he realizes that The Ark of the Covenant that God had given them as a focus for worship was in a tent. Immediately he resolves to rectify the situation and build a temple ( 1Sam 7:2). Wisely David consults his prophetic adviser Nathan who encourages him ( 1Sam 7:3). But then God speaks to Nathan “Whoa not so fast! Did you ask Me before telling David to go ahead; I have other plans for who will build the temple.” So God instructs the prophet to go back to David and tell him that contrary to what he said earlier he was not to build the temple that job was assigned to his son, Solomon.

I often wonder how that must have felt? “Hey, God, I wanted to do something good for you, look at my life so far I have been obedient, I have been patient I’ve done it all right surely its ok to do this. In fact, I am not sure why I asked Nathan in the first place after all its a no brainer, build a temple I will just go do it!”

But no, David does something I think is really remarkable (2 Sm 7:18) he goes and sits before the Lord and prays. He humbly accepts the plans that God has for the temple and gives thanks God for all the promises He made. And more than that, the king actively sets aside abundant resources for Solomon to use when he does build the temple.

So when you pray do you contemplate that God’s answer may be no? Do you realize that when the answer is no it is not because God does not want to bless you? When God answers no He has something better in mind, HIs plan is so much bigger than ours. Are we willing to sit quietly before God as David did? And as Jesus did in the garden of Gethsemane, will you surrender to the answer your Father gives?

Posted January 4, 2020 by jolm15 in Christian Living

Tagged with , , , , , ,

Give and Take Pt 2   Leave a comment

I promised further insight from“Thanks for the Feedback” by Sheila Heen and Douglas Stone, so here is part 2

It would seem that there may be more to learn about receiving feedback than we first think (See post 8/15).  At the end of their first chapter Heen and Stone ask this question ” Why is it that when we give feedback we often feel so right, yet when we receive feedback it so often feels wrong?”  A more detailed look at the “triggers” enumerated in my last post will help. In order to give more objective attention to the feedback we receive, we must first be able to recognize the type of feedback we are receiving. The authors list three; Appreciation, Coaching  and Evaluation.  The first, appreciation, is about our relationship with the giver. An indication that the hard work one has done is valued or simply that they like to have you around! Coaching often takes the form of helpful, constructive suggestions about how something can be improved. Evaluation is simply a statement of performance against a known standard. All three types of feedback are extremely valuable in the right context, but when we expect or want one type and get another, our response can range from frustration to anger and hurt. When we just need someone to tell us they value us and they give us some handy tips on cooking steak, or indeed when we would value some help and all that is forthcoming is an “attaboy” we are left disappointed!  Whereas it maybe difficult to avoid negative responses altogether, being conscious of the type of feedback we are seeking and  recognizing the type we are in fact getting can at least help>